Nov. 27, 2017 "I thank my God for each and every day"

"I thank my God for each and every day"

You have no idea how overwhelmed with gratitude I am right now. 

A mission is a sacred 18 months to 2 years experience. We choose to sacrifice our time and talents and everything we have, and turn and dedicate that to our Father in Heaven and His work. But as Elder Christofferson said to us here in Missouri a couple months ago, "There are missionaries who return from their missions, and feel that they deserve to take a break, that God owes them because of all the service and sacrifice they gave. But let me tell you this: You came on this mission in debt of Him, and you leave on your mission in greater debt. Because of the overwhelming blessings he's given you. He doesn't owe you anything." 

I have been overwhelmed at the blessings and lessons and experiences I have had in this short amount of time. And so it's true, I feel more indebted to Heavenly Father than ever before. 

I never would have expected that I would love Missouri so much; that I would love all the different churches, all the cute Mormon families that come to the visitor center, that I would love giving tour after tour after tour, that I would love studying for hours on end, that I would love talking to complete strangers smoking on their porch, that I would love walking down the street knocking door after door, that I would love the weird looks from others in Walmart on P-day, that I would love change and love all my different areas. In short, I have loved this place. 

My mission has not been easy, not in the least bit. But I'm grateful it wasn't easy. Because when I struggled, faced rejection and discouragement, felt anxiety and fear... I learned to turn to my Father in Heaven and my loving Savior. 

There is no greater privilege than serving a mission. To be able to wear the Savior's name on my heart, and testify of Him by His authority... that has been the most immense blessing; just to be allowed to represent The Lord's Church. And have stewardship over His children! I know this work is real. The experiences I have had as a missionary, and the people I've met have helped me to know that God is real. There are too many miracles and things that could have been coincidences but I know are not. I know without a doubt this truly is the Lords church. None of us is perfect, but the doctrine is. And the power is there. It was restored through Joseph Smith. That power of Jesus Christ I have seen change lives, including mine. 

I know now, more than I ever did before, that God the Father and His son, Jesus Christ are REAL!! And Their gospel is a reality!! This knowledge has impacted my life forever. The gospel is no longer a list of good ideas or suggestions, nor is it even a checklist. It is woven into my being as the way I am to live. Through the gospel of Jesus Christ, I have become something more. There is more meaning to my life. But most especially, I have felt the reality of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I have literally felt Him with me. Through His atonement, I know that there truly is pure and lasting peace and JOY! I have been comforted when nothing else could comfort me. I have been given hope when I had none. I have been enabled to endure and continue on. And I have been cleansed. 

God is real, and so is His Son's Atonement. And I know in a coming day, He will return. (And we'll all get to come back to Missouri for that occasion;) 

As a missionary, God has given me the opportunity to be refined as a person. He has enabled me and allowed me to overcome temptation, turned my weaknesses into strengths and purified me. And I know He will continue to. 

I know my mission is not the end. Everything I've learned and gained as a missionary will only continue to help me throughout my life. And I know that my walk as a disciple of Jesus Christ is just beginning.  

"Yea, and from that time even until now, I have labored without ceasing, that I might bring souls unto repentance; that I might bring them to taste of the exceeding joy of which I did taste; that they might also be born of God, and be filled with the Holy Ghost.

And I have been supported under trials and troubles of every kind, yea, and in all manner of afflictions; yea, God has delivered me from prison, and from bonds, and from death; yea, and I do put my trust in him, and he will still deliver me." (Alma 36:24,27) 

I thank my God for each and every day, for the blessing of the person I've come to be.

“The testimony which ye have borne is recorded in heaven for the angels to look upon; and they rejoice over you. … And now continue your journey” (D&C 62:3–4).

Love you all. See you soon. 

️ Sister Bleak 

maddiebleak3@gmail.com 

Pics 

Last district meeting 

Thanksgiving breakfast w the sisters 

When u read the Book of Mormon with your investigator over the phone for a bedtime story 

Vickies baptism!!!!  ️

Longboards in Liberty 

Lighting ceremony/Xmas activity 

Gonna miss this place  ️

The Hansens! Breakfast this morning 

More last pics

(Elder hale at the bottom is in a split, lol but you can't see it)
And also two of my favorite people in the world!! ❤️❤️

Nov. 20, 2017 "Never Give up on Him"

Never give up on Him

Hey everyone. 

This week was just another good week out here in Missouri. It's been pretty cold here but the past few days it's warmed up. 

This email is going to be a little shorter because we are going to the ZOO!! :) 

Well this week I am very grateful. (#happythanksgiving) but really. I have learned so much on my mission and this week especially I felt blessed by the tender mercies of the Lord. 

I'll be honest, in weeks past we have not really had a lot of success. And sometimes that can be discouraging ya know? Especially when you only have so much more time to wear Christ's name over your heart and testify of Him. HOWEVER, I also learned that the Lord is always mindful of us. And we must NEVER GIVE UP ON HIM. He never gives up on us. 

I'll just give ya a litttle rundown. So with not a lot of success with people, we haven't had many appointments, which means a lot of finding time!! Woooo. But wow the spirit has led us this week! And the spirit led the zone leaders because they came up with the most amazing Zone plan. Basically they said that they felt like each companionship, if they dedicated one hour to an inspired finding activity, we would see a whole bunch of miracles. Therefore the #miraclehour. 

So from 3-4 we would be finding! And Friday was our day to do it. 

Our faith was wavering, but basically every scripture I've read this week said, 

"6 O then ye unbelieving, turn ye unto the Lord; cry mightily unto the Father in the name of Jesus, that perhaps ye may be found spotless, pure, fair, and white, having been cleansed by the blood of the Lamb, at that great and last day.

15 And now, O all ye that have imagined up unto yourselves a god who can do no miracles, I would ask of you, have all these things passed, of which I have spoken? Has the end come yet? Behold I say unto you, Nay; and God has not ceased to be a God of miracles.

21 Behold, I say unto you that whoso believeth in Christ, doubting nothing, whatsoever he shall ask the Father in the name of Christ it shall be granted him; and this promise is unto all, even unto the ends of the earth." (Mormon 9) 

SO WE WENT TO WORK. 

We prayed, and felt like we should go to the west side of our area, then we looked at the potentials and found someone who was way solid but the missionaries hadn't followed up with. So we went here and met Jarexy!! She was so sweet! Haha get this so we introduce ourselves and she's like oh, ok hold on! And we thought she was putting her baby down, but she comes back and gives us a whole bag of food, saying "here ya go, sorry we have a lot extra." 

I was very confused but anyway we got to talking to her and told her about the Book of Mormon and she said we could come back PLUS she added us on Facebook right there!! 

Next person we met was her neighbor... haha he was a funny guy, he didn't really wanna talk to us, so he just chuckled and took his rake for raking leaves and walked away. 

BUT the next person we went to was this referral from a less active. We hadn't been able to see the people that lived there before BUT this time, we met one of the kids that lives there! We were talking to him all about the Book of Mormon and then his mom and sister drove up. Usually moms are not happy when they see two strangers talking to their son outside alone ... but she actually was way friendly and we were able to testify to her about eternal families and ask her if she would like us to come back over and she hesitated for a sec, then was like ... ahh sure why not. WOOO!! 

LASTLY we were able to then talk with the nonmember husband in a part member family who we hadn't gotten in contact with for a while and he said WE COULD COME BACK TOO! 

All in one hour!!!!!!!! Miracles man! 

And it doesn't end there! Just one more thing: Later that night we were at jimmy johns having dinner with a member and I lowkey had this prompting to give the cashier a pass along card. But that's always awkward and sometimes gives off the wrong impression (especially if the guy is your same age and stuff) so I DIDNT act on it. 

We had an appointment and we were running late, and in the car I told sister Licona that I felt we should give a card to him and she SAID SHE THOUGHT THAT TOO. So we vowed that we could go if our appointment fell through. But we didn't want it to fall through, but it all just worked out perfectly because we were able to see our potential with his neighbor who's a member, and we have another appointment tonight! And we were able to zoom back over to jimmy johns and in the car we were a little worried it would be awkward but i was like you know, maybe we aren't even there for that cashier, maybe we're there for his coworker or something. So we get back over there and give the card to the guy explaining what we do as missionaries and what the Visitor Center is all about and he's like, " ok I see this is just a sly way for you to give me your number, huh?" And I'm like "UH NO, SRY WE DONT DATE."  

BUT his manager came over and she's like hey just bein a little nosy, who are you guys? And I was worried because I thought oh maybe she will get mad at us, but she as like No I see you girls in here all the time and you're all so nice and you have to back each other out! And so she was way excited and even excitedly asked US if she could get our card!! Anyways they both have our number and said they'd call us! And we were there at the perfect time for us to meet the manager. 

Wow Heavenly Father truly is so amazing! 

Seriously, just when we are about to give up hope, Heavenly Father shows us He is still there. Sometimes He gives us those trials or those challenges in our lives because in those challenges, we turn to Him more. And I know that if my mission was all easy breezy, I would not know my Savior and my Heavenly Father as well as I do because I have had to rely on Them. 

Here's a quote that made me thing of that: "Elder D. Todd Christofferson explained what he learned from a personal trial: “Though I suffered then, as I look back now, I am grateful that there was not a quick solution to my problem. The fact that I was forced to turn to God for help almost daily over an extended period of years taught me truly how to pray and get answers to prayer and taught me in a very practical way to have faith in God. I came to know my Savior and my Heavenly Father in a way and to a degree that might not have happened otherwise or that might have taken me much longer to achieve. … I learned to trust in the Lord with all my heart. I learned to walk with Him day by day.”​​ (trial of faith oct. 2012) 

Love you all. Keep turning to our Father in Heaven. He is always turned toward you. 

️Sister Bleak 

Pics 

Fall! 

Birthday cake

When u don't have dinner till u go home for the night bc ur too busy 

And setting up Xmas!! 

Some quick zoo pics haha

Nov. 13, 2017 "Welcome to Facebook"

Welcome to Facebook

Hello hello!!!! 

Thank you for your kind happy birthday wishes!!!! Y'all are the best  ️ ️

Since last week we hadn't been seeing much success, we decided to go on a sugar fast for the whole week until we got a new investigator. Because we are determined and we know the Lord will lead us to them! And after a couple weeks of meeting people and not being able to get back in contact with, or facing rejection, we were able to finally make contact with and have a lesson with Christian! Christian was a referral from the elders. They met her while she was outside gardening. She's a young mom with the cutest little boy! Our return appointment with her was on the day we had exchanges, so sister Farnsworth and sister Licona got to teach her and she said she is so open and wants so know!!! Please pray we will be able to continue to meet with her! 

But truly with this opposition, I have been more refined as a missionary because I've had to become more bold when I talk to people and teach and testify of the doctrine RIGHT away. There is no time for small talk anymore. 

This week I've also learned that while you may be bold and teaching with the spirit, the hearer still has the agency to choose what they will do based on what they feel or what you say to them. Like last night, we had a breakthrough lesson with Our investigator Leah. She has been being taught by missionaries literally my entire mission. I remember back last yr in Inde when she was found. But last night we got to the root of why she has not progressed, (and why she continues to not keep commitments and thus slow her progression) she will not have the support from her family. Which of course, is devastating for her. But she said that she still feels like she hasn't gotten an answer and doesn't want to pray to know if this is what she needs to do because she's worried she'll get a "yes." And then she said, "and my gut is telling me that it will be a yes." And after a pause, Sister Licona goes, "Leah I think you've just found out your own answer." And in that moment the spirit came in as a rushing wind and I know it hit Leah. It was powerful. And she knows this is true. And we will keep working with her, but she knows she must act on this if she ever will be able receive the full blessings from this gospel. 

Anyway, when we feel the spirit we must act on it! And act in line with it! 

The other highlight of this week was Zone Conference! My last Zone Conference!!!! It was so surreal. They have all the departing missionaries share their testimonies. After 17 months of Zone conferences watching other missionaries bear theirs, it was crazy for it to be my turn now!! Ahh we wont talk more about it though or else ill cry.

We also learned all about what we are going to be using Facebook for! and you all are probably wondering the same thing, of what in the world we are going to use Facebook for. WELL its actually really cool. With Facebook we will be able to establish daily contact with our investigators. It makes it possible that we can have group chats on messenger with our investigators and with their fellowship, and when we go to bed, if they have questions then the member is there to answer any question right at their fingertips. We can also have Skype lessons for people who have really busy schedules or live really far, and we can create pages and events on Facebook to better work with our Ward!!! That's just a little taste! And also we have a smartphone now!!!! So we basically have the internet whenever we need it, and we are also able to communicate better with that, as well!

we're figuring it all out, so updates and miracles to come. But also still for now, if you try to like comment or message me then I still wont be able to reply. We are still only using Facebook for a missionary purpose. :)

Final thought I want to share with you was what the Stake president, President Cato, (who's like famous here in our mission because of his loud personality and his conversion story - former restoration branch minister) shared with us at Zone Conference. He opened us up to the Bible and we went through some verses throughout the whole book of Luke and  goes through the different miracles and things that the apostles, especially Peter, witnessed at the side of the Son of God.

Was Peter all in right off the bat?

Maybe he thought he was, but his faith would waver on multiple occasions. When the Savior was taken away prisoner, "peter followed afar off" (Luke 22:54) He took a step back. He removed himself. Later after the glorious resurrection, Peter basically says, "Well everyone, we have seen many miracles, it was all good fun. And now im going fishing." Of course we all know what happens next, that the risen Lord appears once again and asks Peter if he really loved Him, and later in Acts 2:1-2 you can see transformation in peter and who he is and his ministry. He was then willing to give his very life for the gospel he preached.

So where are we at? Are we all in?

Maybe we are not there yet, and that is just fine. As long as we keep pressing forward. Because that is the gospel of Christ, that is what Christ is all about is looking forward with peace and optimism.

The adversary will try to remind you of the things in the past and make you think that you are not worthy that while you did that 10 years ago, even if you've changed you still are stained and tainted. He tries to paralyze you in the past. But in the words of President Cato, "THOSE THINGS DONT MAKE A DOGGONE DIFFERENCE." Just repent and Look to Christ FOWARD.

Hope and healing, peace and joy are found forward in Christ. You don't ever need to turn back. So lets do what we need to do to get on the path or stay on the path, and be all in.

I want to work and serve as hard as I can for the rest of my life because I love my Savior. I know He lives. I know it more than anything.

Ahhh I love you all!!!

I love the opportunity my Father gave me to serve His children here in such a special place and represent His church.

Love you.

if you haven't read Elder Holland's talk, "The First Great Commandment" Read it.

I think its from oct. 2012

Pictures!! 

We got to hang out with our recent convert who came to see us last week!! Ahhh love her!!! 

Lunch w the Petersons  ️ ️

Exchanges w sister mudrow!!! 

Zone Conference

4 bffs from beginning to end 

Sister udall, our baby! 

President Cato! Haha 

Mi compy 

Smart phone 

And volleyball this morning. They thought it would be funny to hold me 

 and

Some more pics for ya

Nov. 6, 2017 "The Power of Yet and Divine Coincidences"

The Power of Yet and Divine Coincidences

Wow so much happened this week. It was a good week :) 

First of all, we had Halloween (which I kept forgetting throughout the day) 

And we mainly just had studies and weekly planning then  went to shift. BUT the exciting thing is that right after we had gotten on shift, who did I see outside? THE KNUTSONS!!! (Bffs from NC!) they came to see me! Makayla and Victoria moved to Southern Missouri just over the weekend and it was by divine coincidence that they came to the Visitor Center when we were on shift! We had such a great tour together, the spirit was there so strongly and I think each of us were able to receive answers to our prayers!  ️ ️ love those people. 

Next thing was Thursday night, we had a Book of Mormon study class going on, and we invited Mavis (the sweet sweet less active who wants to come back) and she came!!! Even though she was kind of late, she brought her two cute cute kiddos. But wow she is just so amazing! She is so honest and is just the definition of a broken heart and contrite spirit. She shared with us so etching her 8 yr old son said in the 

Car after her youngest had said "mom I can't read yet." and that was, "See mom! That's the power of YET. Just because something isn't happening right now or you aren't where you want to be now, doesn't mean you won't ever be." That idea has been a source of strength for her as she faces opposition while trying to come back to church. She has so much faith and knows that God is there for her. We were able to take her through Gods plan and we were all just crying. Ahh. Anyways hard to describe but I just love and admire her so much. 

On Friday we had some cool miracles! There hadn't been too many people coming into the VC and so we were talking with the senior couples, and somehow elder Hansen got on the topic of the first vision and he said he had it memorized, so I'm like, " okay now you can pray and say Heavenly Father I have this memorized, please bring someone into the VC who I could share it with!" And I kid you not, a nonmember came in 2 minutes later. We were able to teach him the respiration and he left with a Book of Mormon!!! Who knew prayers could be answered that fast?! 

That night, we didn't have any set plans so we were just going to contact a ton of people. So first we tried a former investigator and he wasn't home so we went to his neighbor, who was a Lutheran and didn't want to talk religion, but gave us each a soda. Lol. Then We needed to go by this family because bishop asked us to, so we tried them, and sadly they weren't home, so we were like well we can try their neighbors (the elect live near the elect) and we met a woman who was Buddhist, so not elect at is time.. and then for some reason I had the feeling (prompting) to go try the house at the very end of the street. And it ended up being s pretty nice RLDS lady haha. But HERES THE MIRACLE. By the time we walked all the way back to our car from this house, the family that we needed to try in the first place had JUST PULLED IN the driveway!!! So we were able to go and talk with them and really connected with them and now we are going to start teaching them the lessons again!!! 

After that we lost our phone and they helped us, but that's beside the point. 

Saturday we had the privilege of having interviews with President Love. And I LOVE THAT GUY. He just knows exactly what to say. And was able to give me a lot of advice and answer a question I had. 

I want to share something he shared with me. 

My question has to do with this quote first: Elder Anderson said: 

“Faith is a principle of power. But that power
usually comes in a response to faith.”
Some might say that baptisms are not determined
by the missionary because it is a moral choice that
every investigator must make. There is truth in that
statement, but there is also truth in this one: There is
a power that can cause things to happen that need
to happen. There is a spiritual force that can stir a
mortal soul toward the spiritual, motivating deeper
study into the Book of Mormon and more prayer
with real intent. Faith is a power, and it can cause
things to happen that need to happen. It can cause a
soul who is good but dormant to awaken to God."

So my question was simply HOW like how do I get the faith enough for it to have this kind of power? What do I do? And how does this relate to their agency. 

And what President Love said is, "So with having the power to make things happen in others lives, you want to know the HOW. And the how is the what. It is faith itself. You must have faith that that can happen. And really, so often we feel that it is all up to us, that we must be the ones to get everything done and make it all happen. It's not OUR power that causes these miraculous changes, it is the power of Jesus Christ. To have the kind of faith that brings power and that power causes things to happen - to get that faith, you simply have faith in the Savior. And His ability to make things happen in our lives or in the lives of others which are necessary for ours or their growth and change. That's just it, we just have faith in Him and take ourselves out of the equation. All we can do is do all we can to be the obedient instrument." 

Makes so much sense right?!? Ahh. Just trust Jesus. 

That night we were picking up at the Visitor Center we were coming for our correlation meeting before that and the elders were late but as we were walking up to the VC I was like, wait, I recognize them!! It was a man and woman who I took through the VC IN AUGUST OF 2016 over a year ago! And we all remembered each other perfectly!! It was a joyful reunion. I had kept in contact with Jason and helped him through some hard times for a few months through online teaching, but had lost contact, and here we were and they were so excited to see me!! It's just so cool to see how the Lord magnifies our efforts and works though us.. Because I didn't do anything amazing in their life, but the spirit did. And the Lord did. 

Okay ok last thoughts are from independence Missoura Stake Conference. 

·  From the stake president, President Cato: "God does not get up in the morning and make your life miserable. That's a myth. If one more person comes to me saying, God is testing me, I'm going to have a conniption fit!"The world we live in is your test. What God IS saying is that we'll never be alone, we will always have a His aid. It is so very important that we don't just preach it, but we Live it. That doesn't mean we are perfect, but we are going to rise a little bit higher, love a little more, give a little more. Can we give what the Lord has asked us to give?"

·  From President Love again: "3 Nephi "Have ye any that... are afflicted in any manner? Bring them hither." He was asking us to bring those to Him. As missionaries we find those who are afflicted in any manner and we bring them to Him. So that He may heal them. May we bring the sick and afflicted unto Christ in all that we do. As we bring others to Him we come to Him ourselves. 

Remember He who loves you infinitely. Bring others to Him and you will come to Him yourself. 

Love you all!!! 

️Sister Bleak 

(My address for letters you can send me for my bday this next week ;))

937 w Walnut st. 

Independence, MO

Pictures! 

(Mostly justa ton of people by the Christus and fall colors lol) 

But we got the KNUTSONS! 

Mavis and her kids! 

And sissy gudgeon! #mtccomps